What I Learned During Pride Month


That was a very animated exhale of relief.

Pride month is over…but BiVisibility month is almost here.

June is the month designated for all things Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Asexual, Intersex (LGBTQAI). Rainbows drape our city from banners to building lights to colorful outfits on every other person and establishments working hard to get those gay dollars.

Every LGBTQAI organization or agency is in a frenzy the entire month promoting, throwing events, parties, classes, groups, gatherings, gallery showings, fashion shows, drag shows and anything else you can imagine to celebrate and acknowledge LGBTQAI Pride.

NYC Pride March 2015
Sea of Flags. Coming down Christopher Street nearing the end of the Pride March, NYC, 2015

Now, here’s my take on it all.

My mother was very involved with The March as I was growing up. I marched as a child with her then in my teen years independently of her with youth groups.

I stopped participating in all things PRIDE around 18 for religious reasons (Pride is listed as one of the 7 deadly sins…I chose to not partake in any activities under that label). I marched again for the first time again at age 33 which was 2 years ago, then again this year.

The first year back was to immerse my husband in the Community so he could see this sexuality thing is much more than sex. There are many facets and layers to this sexuality thing. Not to celebrate my Queerness but to educate someone who knew a little but not a lot about the issues we face(d) and the journey we all still face. We did get “caught up” in the fever and partook in our fair share of indulgence 😉

The second year we marched together, him fully understanding the many faces of Our Community, in solidarity with “the movement”. He saw how the B in LGBTQAI seemed to be silent in so many ways. He understood the many levels of this LGBTQAI Community here in NYC and why I cared so much about Our Bi Community. 🙂

This year my daughter and I marched in partnership with The Brooklyn Community Pride Center to promote BiWifeLife in whatever capacity we could.

Under normal circumstances I’m not much involved in the LGBTQAI Community here in NYC or anywhere else due to the many layers and overtly oppressing politics within and the unspoken but all powerful “Gay hierarchy” in which Bisexuals are the dirty bunch, the bad apples and the kids “they” don’t like to play with.


I also avoid political bullshit (and there’s A LOT in NYC’s queer community) because I’m a very outspoken politically incorrect person at times (think Wendy Williams, Whoopie Goldberg). Especially when pissed off, therefore I choose to refrain from situations where I may rub the wrong person the wrong way and stagnate the growth of this BiWife Community.

Now, with all that being said, I love BiWifeLife. I really do.

I worked my butt off this entire month to build partnerships and promote Us.


Because there’s clearly a need for Our space and I’d love to make it truly accessible to every woman all over the world. I aspire to turn this blog into a 501c3 organization with ground meetings across the U.S and beyond if I could.

I also realize it’s not within my capacity to do so without the assistance of others.

I’d like to thank Our Contributing Author Mercedes Jet for traveling into NYC to be a part of this year’s march.

She carried our sign (which I was mortified to find had the wrong url…but folks have been finding Us anyway) through the entire march behind the banner of The New York City Bisexual Contingent which included many Bi groups such as NYBAN, BiRequest and others.

What I learned this year is how pertinent preparedness is for promoting one’s LGBTQAI Org, how much work it takes to publicize a new org in a sea of other orgs and how little sleep I would get.

Again, I also realized how much I couldn’t do alone.

In all honesty I don’t want to take the month of June to run myself ragged. I do still have a family and a Community does not  include ONE person alone. Father’s Day is important, my husband’s birthday happens to be Pride kickoff, the 26th and he would like ONE year where we just don’t do ANYTHING pride unless he wants.

I implore all you regular readers to ponder how YOU can contribute to getting the word out about BiWifeLife and helping others find US. 

There’s a host of approaches one could take from social media management to ground promotions to calling other orgs and sending emails and of course CONTRIBUTING AUTHORS.

This  is a CALL TO ALL READERS,  participate, don’t just watch the posts and comments, get involved!

We are here for you, help us make it possible to be there for people who don’t even know we’re here.

Email: biwifelife@gmail.com to become involved.


-Jay Dee, Founder



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