It’s been a long while since I’ve posted.
Mainly because I didnt know what to post about. Honestly, my life hasn’t had any bi anything in it. 😦
With the change of season in my Great city the abundance of gorgeous women is staggering. I find myself innately and acutely aware of my sexuality. I’m mostly with my family and women obviously don’t presume my stare is one of desire or lust because I must be straight if I’m with my husband and kids.
I’ve taken to wearing a small LGBT pride pin wherever I go BUT I presume people assume I’m supporting one of my obviously LGBT children.
Even when I’m alone the ring on my left hand says I’m off limits despite my LGBT pin strategically placed where EVERYONE can see it and my obvious interest when looking or flirting with a female. (maybe I’m married to a woman? )
I refuse to go without my wedding rings anywhere. Ever. I am married. Taken by a wonderful man. I am in love. With a wonderful man.
The internet doesn’t work. After 3 years I’m so frustrated with that process I refuse to indulge at present.
Thing is, to be honest, I’m a woman with needs. I find myself so sexually frustrated it’s almost painful #blueballs?
If my husband had a vagina and functional penis life would be perfect but he does not.
Lesbian porn bores me. Does nothing for me. What I crave is more than sex.
I crave Her smile, Her smell, Her laugh, Her ‘mad’ face, Her taste. I miss Her txts, Her voice, the sight of Her walking toward me with love in her eyes.
It drives me insane and the truth is sometimes I get so fed up with my own self for having such a strong pull toward women despite being blessed with a wonderfully awesome husband.
THIS is exactly why I started this blog.
The challenges we face are so quietly tortuous. We suffer silently most times in our own heads.
There are those of us who have wonderful supportive husbands who encourage and love us as we struggle in this biwife life.
There are many who do not.
It is PRIDE Month and through my BiWifeLife promotion efforts who knows I may come across Her.
I can only hope…
-Jay Dee, Founder