Not only have I known bisexual women, I had the very unique opportunity to be in a poly relationship with three women for well over 25 years and who displayed varying degrees of bisexuality and who also had three different schools of thought when it came to talking about their sexuality.
I think about what I know about these three women and it never failed to amaze me how similar they were but how different they were in their approach to sex and sexuality and that was beyond the obvious fact that they were three different people.
My wife, having been actively bisexual for many years, was so comfortable being bi that there were times she’d easily fall in love (or something resembling it) with some women; the woman I’ll call Poly Wife #1, well, she got… indoctrinated one night when the three of us were trying to break the bed. I’ll be honest: When my wife went down on PW1, I thought all holy hell was going to break out over this very spontaneous action. PW1 was surprised but didn’t fuss one bit.
PW1 told me the next day that, yep, the move surprised her but, at the same time, she expected it… but not really. I knew in my mind that what took place wasn’t one of those “if it’s gonna happen” things – it was a “when,” not because I knew my wife was bisexual but, logically, it made sense that once the three of us started making love together, something like this was gonna happen.
PW1 had a concern about being seen as a lesbian by others and I asked her a single question: Who’s gonna find out? I know I used to spend quite a bit of time talking to her about having bisexuality sprung on her and I guess because women tend to handle such things better than men do, I didn’t get a sense that having my wife wanting to take her to bed without me around was that much of a problem… but, yeah, turns out that it was… but it wasn’t… but PW1 was of a mind to just roll with things just the same. I had a hard time figuring this mindset out and, I dunno, I guess PW1 lacked the communication skills to explain it to me.
PW2 started out with what I’d call a “usual” mindset, telling me whenever we discussed my bisexuality that there was nothing another woman could do for her… then found out that there was… and dived into the girl sex thing with the same passion and ferocity she displayed when making love with me. Now, PW1 said, at first, that she wasn’t going to do anything with PW2; I remember mentioning this to PW2 and all she said was, “Let me talk to her…”
Folks, I don’t know what they talked about… but I do know what happened; later, PW1 told me – and as if we were talking about the weather – that she had a good talk with PW2 about the sex thing and confirmed that they did do more than just talk about it – all the while, PW1 couldn’t keep from smiling. I wanted to know what was said to change her mind and all PW1 said was, “Hey, I can change my mind if I want to…”
I asked PW2… and with what I called her “evil grin,” she told me to mind my business because what was said didn’t have shit to do with me. I knew that my wife knew what was said to change PW1’s mind… and she also told me to mind my own business. I changed tactics and asked PW2 what changed her mind and she said that, for one, it just made sense and that if she was going to be in the relationship then she was going to fully immerse herself into every aspect of it.
I was happy that all of this turned out well (for the most part). One day, I came home and found the three of them sitting and talking and I made the “mistake” of asking them what was happening. PW2 gave me the evil grin and said, “Oh, we were just talking about who eats pussy the best, that’s all!”
Now, readers, I’ve been ‘munching cookies’ since I was ten. There were plenty of women who were more than willing to teach me how to do it and, if I can be allowed to say so, I got to be pretty damned good at it. So imagine the look on my face when I was told that when it came to munching cookies, I ranked at the bottom of the list!
My feelings weren’t hurt but it didn’t escape me that three women who had told me that when it came to munching cookies, I was both very good and dangerous when I handled my business. Now I felt that, eh, I wasn’t as good as they were.
Seems like it’s very true that only a woman knows what a woman needs…
Of the three, PW1 was less, um, enthusiastic about the girl sex. She very much enjoyed it but unless PW2 was with us, she preferred to have sex with me (or with me present) than really getting into the one-on-one thing or the threesomes they’d have. My wife, well, as long as she was able to make love with either of them, she was happy; it didn’t matter to her if I was there or not. PW2 was a driving force in this; she’d grab one or both of them, lock me out of the bedroom, and just tear them a new one… then turn around and wear me out.
There were quite a few times when the four of us would be in bed together… and I got my head handed to me every time. Sometimes, they’d get started on each other and I couldn’t get in there no matter how hard I tried; I’d wind up being a spectator or brought in as an afterthought; one time, they got started on each other, remembered that I was there and told me to get the fuck out and don’t come back until called for.
And they did finally send for me… three hours later.
I wasn’t offended… but this dynamic between them was damned interesting and when I was relegated to the sidelines, I would just sit and watch and, yeah, take mental notes. I’m no slouch in bed… but when it came to watching them tear each other up? It was as if I just wasn’t qualified to be in bed with them.
If anything, their “enthusiasm” for having sex with me escalated when it was one-on-one; when I had sex with any two of them, sure, it pushed me to my limits and way past them because these three women were quite formidable in bed… but it made our threesomes “easier” because they were more than willing to work each other over before ganging up on me.
I observed and learned so much from them about bisexual women from my very special perspective…
-KDaddy23, Contributing Author