According to an online survey conducted by Rostosky, Riggle, Hague, and McCants (Psychology & Sexuality, Vol. 1, No. 2, May 2010, 131-144), bisexuals were asked what they like about being bisexual and said some of the following:
- “Freedom from social labels
- Honesty and authenticity
- Having a unique perspective
- Increased levels of insight and awareness”
Freedom from social labels means people do not want to be put into a box because sexuality for most of us is not something that can be easily explained and is not so cut and dry. Many people being surveyed commented along these lines “You’re not being boxed in by one set of expectations or confined to a specific label/role because not everything is cut and dry. Sexuality is too complex to be broken down into such simplistic terms. While I swing toward one gender, I can be drawn to another gender. I do not generally use labels, I sometimes am asked specific questions about my sexuality from people who want to understand this part of me better. Over the decades I have used the following labels: not straight, bisexual, pansexual, queer, fluid, bisexual lesbian, fluid lesbian. People learn from me that I do not have to be in a box and that it is totally ok to choose no label and I love that.”
Other commenters believed that by identifying as bisexual, it gave them the freedom to dress “how they like and to create their own style – because if they had chosen a gay/lesbian identity they would feel pressured to look a certain way and to ‘code’ a particular way.” Another person said “I dress based on the energy I want to express whether that be feminine, masculine, androgynous changes from day to day and I do not limit myself just to how I dress when I’m out socializing, I also tune into this energy in the bedroom.”
People also did not feel the need to subscribe to the traditional monogamous relationship lifestyle and could enjoy the freedom to define their relationship in the way that worked for them with more flexibility.
The “freedom to live authentically and honestly” gave one person a feeling of “rather than being ‘this not that’, I am this AND that…I’ve felt like a blossoming flower. As I become more fully aware and I’m more comfortable with each petal of my identity. I open myself up and look into the sun…as someone who identifies as bisexual and does not see the world on a multitude of plains, my intellect and creativity, my head and my heart, are just further parallels of how I am able to find myself attracted to and love both men and women.”
This “unique perspective” which is another positive aspect of bisexual identity, gives people self-awareness and insight because by changing the way they look at sexuality, it allows them to be more open to themselves and what unfolds. This openness is necessary to combat the fear that often gets in the way of people evolving and learning more about themselves as they age.
What do you find love about being bisexual?
Sound off below!
-Mercedes Jet, Contributing Author