Divorce, Can It Happen To You? (Coming Out)


It can happen to any marriage for so many reasons. Due to financial reasons, infidelities, arguments, physical violence, whatever.

‘Coming Out’ to a spouse who didn’t know you were bisexual could be a very strong case for divorce as well.

Adultery or infidelity causes loss of trust, anger, pain & many other feelings.

Are you ready to accept the fact your ENTIRE WORLD may change once you open your mouth and say “I’m Bisexual.”?

There are many things to ponder before ‘coming out’ to a spouse- or anyone for that matter.

If you haven’t cheated but feel a need to ‘come out’ a few of the possible questions after your disclosure may be: Are you trustworthy? Did you lie about your sexuality or did you omit it? (Some people say it’s the same thing, to each his own.) Have you ever cheated with another woman? …and last but not least, Why didn’t you say anything before?

Lots of marriages fail every year.

Would your spouse be wrong for leaving you if you ‘come out’ after you get married?

Were you ‘wrong’ for not saying something regarding your sexuality BEFORE getting married?

The thing that gets me is why not come out before you get married?

Why hide who you are from the person you want to spend your life with?

Is that fair?

Is filing for divorce if you ‘come out’ after marriage wrong?

Please, sound off below. I’d love to hear your comments.

-Jay Dee, Founder


6 thoughts on “Divorce, Can It Happen To You? (Coming Out)

  1. It seems to me that if, say, a husband divorces a wife just because she told him that she’s bisexual, that’s pretty damned selfish of him and I’d even say hypocritical because he did vow “for better or for worse…” didn’t he? If a bisexual doesn’t reveal this before getting married – and I think we know exactly why they wouldn’t – have they committed a “crime” by not revealing it? Some say yes and that a couple on the verge of marriage should invoke full disclosure of everything… like people really do that, right?

    If our hypothetical husband finds out that wifey is bisexual after the fact, why would he automatically assume that she’s slept with women before they married (and what would it matter if she did?) or ask if she’s gonna start sleeping with women and then get all bent out of shape and want to end the marriage? What if wifey didn’t find out that she was bisexual until AFTER they got married? Why would he freak the hell out and if he did, is he being selfish?

    1. I do agree hypothetical hubby would be totally violating the for better or for worse vow, but on the flip side I know that each person is different, has varying tolerances and thresholds. Gotta respect how people feel you know? It may be selfish but at the same token maybe it’s a blessing for her. She gets to be free and find someone who will love her completely now that she knows who she is…after soul searching, growing and changing over the years. That is if she didn’t know she was bi when she married. If she did know and didn’t disclose I’d be pissed too. I wouldn’t leave her because I am me but I do believe in full disclosure before marriage.
      Honestly I did “get got” a few times and that’s why they are ex husbands. Not everyone can tolerate everything.
      -Jay Dee, Founder

  2. I honestly did not know that I was bisexual until early this year. It took me 46 years to figure it out, and to accept it. And it has caused conflicts with us. It’s a pretty drastic thing to tell your spouse of 20 years. But I really had no idea that the things I felt meant that I was bi.

    1. Now that’s a whole ‘nother animal. If your spouse can’t understand you’ve come through an internal journey through the years and found you were bisexual then how supportive is your spouse? On the other hand just because you didn’t know until now does that mean he/she has to accept the new you that you’ve discovered? They married the straight version of you. Maybe that’s the only you they can love. On a totally different wave length who says your partner is ‘The One’ for you if you come out and he/she decides they can’t deal? The One will love the side of you that loves men, and the side of you that loves women I believe.
      -Jay Dee, Founder

      1. My husband is dealing with it the best that he can. He still isn’t quite grasping the fact that I want to have sex with a women. He’s ok with the thought of them turning me on though.

      2. Lol, acceptance doesn’t always come at once. It can be a gradual ongoing process. So long as he still loves you as a person then that’s what counts! Kudos to hubby and hey, if he needs time, try to be patient, take your time & give him time. It can be a real shocker to find something like this out.
        -Jay Dee, Founder


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