National Coming Out Day is Coming!!!

National Coming Out Day | Resources | Human Rights Campaign.

October 11th is National Coming Out Day!!! 🙂 ….:(?

If there’s one trend I’ve noticed here on BiWifeLife is that a lot of people are comfortable being secretly bisexual.

Some bisexual married women work hard so nobody will find out, find creative ways to hide, disguise or avoid their bisexuality.

Other bisexuals are really comfortably closeted and know how to live the straight lie.

There are other bisexual married women like myself who don’t care who knows and who doesn’t.

For many on this site, their spouses don’t know they are bisexual, their family and friends don’t know. There are few on here so far who are out loud and proud about their bisexuality.

That’s why I created this site. For support in living in Our own skin.

Are you really comfortable living with secret desires, feelings and thoughts?

On the flip side.

Why should you ‘come out’ in the first place? Does your sex life have to be announced to the world? Who’s business is it who you sleep with?

It’s your spouses business at least!!!

If you’re married and he doesn’t know your sexual orientation I believe that is unfair. Your spouse should know you like your best friend knows you. No secrets, no hiding things. That’s just MY perception.

I am not insensitive to the many cultures where bisexuality or any form of homosexuality is punished as a serious crime against nature. I STRONGLY URGE anyone who lives in such a culture to consider your safety and well being before considering coming out to anyone.

For those of us who do not live in such cultures you may have MANY REASONS to hide your sexuality.

Coming out could hurt your marriage, family and social life. Maybe hiding is better for you socially and professionally, for your children’s sake, out of consideration for your spouses professional or social life.

Maybe being anything other than straight is purely unacceptable in your family, religious congregation or community.


Love Yourself!!! is an awesome saying and and great movement/project. Check it out. It may help you a bit.

-Jay Dee, Founder

5 thoughts on “National Coming Out Day is Coming!!!

  1. My wife is bisexual and I have never had a girlfriend who was not bisexual. Did not plan it that way or look for bisexual women; just happened that way. Although my wife and I shared the same girlfriend for most of our 43 year marriage, we never thought about it or even discussed it. This is the truth; I asked my wife only last year if she considered herself as being bisexual. I never asked her before and we never used the “B” word. Her reply was that she never thought about it before.

    That says it all. We never thought about our threeway relationship with her best girlfriend as being anything but normal. For me, I only had bisexual lovers for my entire adult life, so it was normal to me. For my wife, a virgin when we got married, liking both genders was all she knew about sexual attraction. Our g/f had same sex relationships in college but married a man, had a son, divorced, hung with us for a few years and then married a guy she met online who was OK with her continuing to be our lover while not wanting to participate himself. Despite this non conventional arrangement, it was our normal life. We lived in a time where people did not openly speak of their sex lives. Heck, we had good friends who we socialized with twice a week who we discovered where into swinging and wife swapping with a few other couples we knew from our subdivision. Bisexuals were not accepted as a valid sexual orientation in our day. If you had sex with a woman and were married, you were considered a closet lesbian in our time. So there were no groups to join or campaign for, No one accepted bisexuals.

    For the three of us, it was just our normal life. We did not tell or hide the fact that we were a threesome. Due to the time we lived in, no one questioned why my wife’s girlfriend always seemed to be at our house when they visited us or why she had her own bedroom. No one ever asked probably because both my wife and girlfriend were very feminine and not anyone’s idea of a lesbian, as portrayed in the old days. We also did not discuss our sex life with straight people we knew but with strangers, the ladies loved to put on a show making sure that the straight laced people around us knew that they were lovers and with me. We called it our foreplay and it made us all hot for each other to give society the figurative finger.

    We always thought we were normal, despite our unconventional lifestyle. It was different but normal for us. All three of us only knew a bisexual lifestyle, even though I was only with bisexual women and not bisexual myself. There was no internet back in our time so we had no access to what other people were doing, groups or organizations. When the internet did arrive, none of us went to sex related websites or forums. We just lived our life and felt no need to read about it or share it. For me it was even odder because I was designing and running websites before it was mainstream and graphical. I guess that my life fulfilled my sexual needs and never felt a need to use the internet. Now that I am no longer part of a threesome, I do feel the need to write about it. To examine it and learn why it was the way it was. However, none of us feels part of a group or a need to proclaim that we are who we are. We never had a single problem living our lifestyle and as I mentioned, no one talked about sex back then, even straight people so we never had to lie or hide anything. It simply was what it was and if anyone was interested in looking closer, they could see what we were all about, but no one did.

  2. I wish my wife would come out but we are old and in our time, if you had sex with a woman, you were a lesbian.:) Now she no longer has a girlfriend and her friends are all very religious, as older people tend to be when staring death in the face. She will never tell them or even her sister who she is very close to. Whether anyone knows or not, we do not know. Our g/f was with us most times when they visited but it was always that she was there as my wife’s out of town g/f who was staying the weekend rather than driving all the way back home in a different State.

  3. Hell, I ain’t skittish about it but, like you, I recognize that there are a lot of bi and/or bi-curious men in the blogosphere that could be rather skittish, which is why I share my thoughts, feelings, and experiences and tell it like I’ve seen it over the five decades I’ve been actively bisexual.

    If we don’t do these things, who will?


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